Ava and Lena’s List of Requirements for Being a Silly Goose

Ava Martin and Lena Nielsen
December 6, 2022

  1. You must stay partial to your five AM gobbles.
  2. You must be very high maintenance.
  3. You must be greedy for your crackers.
  4. You must always carry around a butcher knife.
  5. You must spontaneously break out into song.
  6. You have to be on Team Edward.
  7. You must wear glasses, even if you don’t need them (3D ones count)
  8. You must have a pun on hand at all times even if it makes no sense
  9. You have to like Dance Moms
  10. You can’t find babies cute, and you must have a strong desire to kick all children.
  11. You must complement peoples’ teeth (for manipulative reasons)
  12. You must brush your teeth at least twice a day.
  13. You must drink a lot of caffeine
  14. You must respect other silly geese.
  15. You must get hiccups at least once a week.
  16. You must support underground indie artists, like Radiohead, or Nirvana.
  17. You must be either an Alpha or a Sigma. Betas, Gammas, and Omegas do not count!!
  18. You must be excited for the upcoming Barbie movie.
  19. Silly geese must always clean up their accidents on the carpet.
  20. Though birds are not real, as all know, geese are a figurehead; a symbol of goofiness.